My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
