I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
