I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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