Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
