So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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