found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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