how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Panties = found
Randomize
