someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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