Grow some girl-balls and come out already
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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