I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
