i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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