Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
