Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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