Betty ford says i'm here all night
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
