This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
