I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
