You smell like stripper and shame
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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