A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
