Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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