I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize