In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
