I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
