I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize