I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
