i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
