When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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