i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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