I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
