she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
