we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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