Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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