I have demons in me.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
