There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
