Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
