I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
operation have a gay friend backfired
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
