wanna go halves on a baby?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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