awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
