Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
