so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
