I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
