if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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