hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
