goodnight i made you a song goodbye
areolas are like halos for boobs.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I would fuck him just for his dog
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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