6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
ugly people sure do ruin things
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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