he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
