Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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