I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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