Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
