do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
