..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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