We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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